While many nobs are knobs
And some knobs are plebs,
No pleb is a nob –

And vice versa.

Nobs have watch-fobs
And walk round in Lobbs.
Plebs do odd-jobs
And breakfast on cobs.

Wealthy nobs’ knobbery’s
Sheer daylight robbery;
Plebbery knobbery’s
Part-of-the-mobbery;
Bullingdon gobbery’s
Nobbery yobbery,
Pseudo-nobs’ knobbing
Is Jacob Rees-Moggery.

Are nobs more knobbish?
Or are most knobs plebbish?
Do nobs go for snobbish
And say plebs are rubbish?
Or plebs say, with relish,
That nobs are all nebbish
And haven’t the courage
To stop being hellish?

Some nobs are knobs,
And some knobs are plebs,
Some nobs are snobs

But all snobs are knobs.